So Much: So Little

I'm burdened tonight. I can't understand how I possibly live the way that I live when others in the world around me are dying. Dying from starvation, poverty, disease... I don't know how I profess to know the God that I do and continue to live like this. I don't know how the brokenness that I see daily doesn't affect me more than it does.
The Hole in our Gospel. Richard Stearns



This isn't a call for pity and it's definitely not a call for self gratification. This is me with a broken heart, fighting tears as I walked to my apartment tonight, wondering why I'm not doing more. We are good as Americans at saying, "we've done enough." We draw this line in the sand by comparing what we're doing to what others are doing and saying we've done our part. I do it all the time. But my example isn't supposed to be you, it's supposed to be Jesus. And quite frankly it wasn't enough for Him until He gave everything. So please don't console me and tell me that I've done enough but rather ask yourself the same questions that I can't seem to shake tonight. Why isn't the brokenness, the poor, the hungry, the dying affecting me more; affecting us more? How am I okay living the way I'm living when the rest of the world is dying?

We are the richest people in the world by far. The things that we consider normal conveniences like cars and clean water and food on the table daily are extravagant. They are luxuries unknown to the rest of the world. I was going to decorate for Christmas tonight. I would much rather turn on some Christmas tunes and decorate than sit here and wrestle with this. Believe me, when I'm honest, I'd rather not care. But I can't seem to shake what I'm feeling lately despite every night how hard I try. I don't believe it's a call to carry around guilt. I do believe however, that it is a call not only to be grateful and aware of all that I have, but to do more. I was in Ecuador recently and we asked ourselves, "How much do you think we're supposed to give?" One of the answers was, "I think we're supposed to give until it hurts, because that's what Jesus did." As much as I don't want to, I think that answer is right.

Join me in seeking what more you can do. Be grateful for all that you have. Pray. Ask God what your role is in this. And have the guts to follow Him into the answer, knowing He's already there.  Pray for me that I'll be willing to do the same.  We're all in this together.  Tonight I want us to do more.   I think that our lives should have a little less so that others can have a little more.

Comments

Anonymous said…
You know you and I are on the same page. I do think though, God himself has blessed you. You have done nothing to earn it. What you have and where you are are gifts from him to you. He smiles when you are warm. It brings him joy when you enjoy a hearty meal. We each have a lot in life. Scripture tells us to be content with our lot. Yes, give and give and give. But don't forget to live and live and live. He died so you can live as much a joyous life here as in Heaven. He smiles when you do. It's not our place to assume the lives he gives others is wrong. His plan is perfect. Yes, man brings sin. But don't think for one minute that if the God of the universe wanted Juarez or anyplace else to suddenly be a booming metropolis, he'd make it so. We are not in control. All of this, whether we like it or believe it, is part of a PERFECT plan.
Unknown said…
Oh. I love to read this. I can't help reading this and not think about Randal(correct name? guy from Acuna-crazy build with electric problem) I'm reminded of his Joy. I remember thinking he was crazy but at the same time wanting to be considered crazy with him. He gave everything. It seemed like he had given so much it didn't hurt any longer but instead he found extreme joy in loosing it "all". I think often of him and the verse "to die is gain" I'm daily reminded of that night and still trying to process what the Lord was trying to teach me. Thanks for wrestling with this.
Britt said…
Thanks for your comments and for being willing to live in the struggle with me.

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